I ask the Lord to not let all of these to be true. I ask him to make these as a lie!!! A lie that could put my soul at peace. Today, 26 August 2008 Is the Seventh day that my dear beloved Grandfather has departed, leaving us to mourn and pull our strength together.
My Grandfather; Baski Bin Arfa is decended from a Boyanese family in Indonesia. He is the head of my family after the death of my Great-grandmother and after my father. He has a healing hand that will massage ppl's broken limb to full use again(tukang-urut).
I really miss him now that he is gone. Everytime I go to johor, there will be 2ppl that I will salam(peace-giving) first, My granny, then my gramps. But now, there will be one person less.
Just last week, he was here visiting me, my lil-bro and my mum. I watch the tele with him and the last favour I ask of him is to massage my head(headache). Recently too I ask him for Blessed-water for my prelims and that too is not finish. He was soo reluctant to go back and wanted to stay here longer. He even ask my mum to buy him a new prayer-mat(sejadah).
I remember last time, when I still dont have a step-father. He will always decipline me and teach me ways of old and the new embraced religion(Islam). Even though it hurts when he beats me but it is nothing compared to now. Before he died, he managed to do his mid-day prayers(Z'hur), play with my two baby niece. His knees was also getting better from his knee problem.
Now I'm asking. Does God has to be cruel in order to be merciful? Does he has to take someone so dearly loved just for another door of opportunity? That day, I hated God so much(The same thing for my Great-grandmothers' death), He was an enemy to me. It was also my first time crying for days this year. but it all soon ended when I had to practise what I preached:
"To love is to let go"
"When a door closes, another door opens"
Be Blessed People!!!
